Penne for Your Thoughts? 138 Food Puns That Will Make You Laugh

In queso didn’t know, we’re all about enjoying a delicious meal with the ones we love. So, why not add a little humor to the mix? It’s the perfect side dish to any meal. So whether you’re a fan of dad jokes or could give the Bard a run for his money, this list of cheesy food puns will give you and your friends something to taco about…

Food puns

1. Why is it pointless to keep secrets from a bottle of wine? Because it will eventually hear them through the grapevine.
2. Do you know a pickle’s favorite folk singer? It’s Bob Dill-lan
3. Why do cheeses never worry about anything? Because everything’s gonna brie all right.

4. Why are herbs so expensive? Because thyme is money.
5. What did the rooster say to the hen before leaving for work? Have an egg-cellent day!
6. Why did the pepper shaker go to jail? For a-salt with a deadly weapon.
7. Have you heard the new hit song by the boy band from Vietnam? It’s call “Bao, Bao, Bao.”
8. Why did the tortilla handle the situation by itself? Because it’s nacho problem.
9. Have you heard the Mexican weather forecast? It’s chili today, hot tamale.
10. How do people say goodbye in Italy? Pasta la vista, baby!
11. Herbs tend to be punctual to all their meetings. They wear watches to help them arrive on thyme.
12. What did the dinner roll say to the cream cheese? You butter back off, pal!
13. Why did the pickle get special treatment? Because he’s kind of a big dill.
14. Take as many pieces as you want. There’s polenta to go around!
15. Chickpeas like to upstage everyone. They always respond with “bean there, done that.”
16. You’re a real pizza work.
17. Don’t believe that man! He’s an im-pasta!
18. The ocean spoke to me once when I went surfing. It asked, “Water you doing?”
19. What day of the week do potatoes love the most? Fry-day!
20. Green tea leaves are very grateful. They love writing notes that say “Thank you very matcha.”
21. What do you call a noodle that’s a stranger? One that udon know

22. Fried shrimp are always angry. They have a hard time controlling their tempura.

23. Cold coffees are great at giving compliments. They love telling you how brew-tiful you are.
24. The police found a dead woman in a bathtub full of milk. They suspect a cereal killer.
25. Dumplings are never satisfied. They’re always left wonton more.
26. Why did the two cookies get married? Because they were in a serious relation-chip.
27. Rosemary and her husband Herb love gardening. This hobby is their favorite of all-thyme.
28. Never make plans with croissants — they’re flaky!
29. Time fries when we ketchup.
30. What kind of music do avocados listen to? Guac ‘n’ roll!
31. My neighbor Al Dente is always positive. He thinks nothing is im-pasta-ble!
32. The two herbs that met in the garden are now dating. Some things are just mint to be.
33. Noodles love Valentine’s Day and sending flowers and chocolate to their loved ones. They’re hopeless ramen-tics.
34. She believed she could, sushi did!
35. Carbonated drinks love playing sports. They like getting fizzy-cal!
36. Mr. Tahini recently celebrated his 50th wedding anniversary. After all those years, he told his wife, “Words cannot express hummus I love you!”
37. Eggs are great comedians. They’re always telling funny yolks.
38. Why didn’t the avocado go alone to the dance? He thought it would be guac-ward.
39. What did the hot dog say to his wife? I mustard-mit, I relish you!
40. What did the loaf of bread say to her hero? You’re my roll model.
41. What did breakfast say to show her appreciation for dinner? Thanks a brunch!
42. What type of music is played at a Chinese restaurant? Wok ‘n’ roll.
43. When it comes to eating sausage, I’m not a fan of the German kind. I think they’re the wurst.
44. If you don’t like tacos, I’m nacho type.
45. How do you stop people from stealing bagels? You put lox on them.
46. Which mollusk is the most in shape? Mussels
47. What is pepperoni’s favorite tourist site in Italy? The Leaning Tower of Pizza
48. Why don’t opera performers ever go hungry? They’re always singing for their supper.
49. What did the sushi say to the bee? “Wasabi!”
50. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up
51. Why does everyone like hanging out with the mushroom ? Because he’s a fungi
52. Why did the coffee file a police report? Because it got mugged
53. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta
54. What did one plate say to the other plate? “Dinner’s on me!”
55. Why don’t lobsters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish
56. What did the piece of tofu say to her boyfriend? You’re my soy mate.
57. What do you call friends who you like to eat with? Taste buds
58. Why is spaghetti the smartest food there is? It always uses its noodle.
59. Why did the ice cream cone become a reporter? He wanted to get the scoop.
60. Why wouldn’t the teddy bear eat anything? He was already stuffed.

Fruit puns

61. What did the grapefruit tell her daughter on the first day at her new school? Juice be yourself!
62. This may sound bananas, but I find you a-peeling.
63. What happened after the cantaloupe won the lottery? It became a melon-aire!

64. Why do so many stone fruits want to be astronauts? Because they all want to peach for the stars.
65. What did the citrus ask each other when they arrived at the amusement park? Orange you excited?
66. Do you know what fruits are the saddest? Cantaloupes and honeydews. They’re always feeling melon-choly.
67. Why did the two melons wait to get married? Because they cantaloupe.
68. Have you been to a party with dried grapes? They’re the best! They’re always raisin the roof.
69. The odds of seeing a square cantaloupe are one in a melon!
70. What did Bosc say to her boyfriend Bartlett? We make a beautiful pear.
71. What do pirates go in search of? Berry treasure.
72. Why do fruits like the end of fairy tales? Because everyone lives apple-y ever after.
73. Did you hear the one about the fruit salad? A-pear-antly not!
74. Lemons are terrible at dating. They always use the worst pickup limes.
75. Historians just uncovered a lost novel by Charles Dickens. It’s called Grape Expectations.
76. You’re being very un-raisin-able right now.
77. Stone fruits live by one simple motto: Eat, drink, and be cherry.
78. If your boyfriend doesn’t appreciate fruit puns, let that mango!
79. Why didn’t the lime want to buy the used car? He heard it was a real lemon.
80. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing
81. Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling very well
82. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot
83. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
84. What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit? A neck-tarine
85. How do you make a lemon drop? Just let it fall
86. Why do oranges do so well in school? They can concentrate.
87. When do you go on red and stop at green? When eating a watermelon.

Vegetable puns

88. I love you from my head tomatoes.
89. This may sound corny, but I think you’re a-maize-ing.
90. Why does everyone like to hangout with a mushroom? Because he’s a real funghi!
91. What kind of martial arts do vegetables practice? Carrot-e!
92. Vegetables are the best DJs. All they want to do is turnip the beet!
93. Why was the spy fired from his job? He was leek-ing secrets.
94. You look radish-ing today.
95. Never settle for being medi-okra.
96. I have so mushroom in my heart.
97. One of the greatest war heroes was a head of lettuce. He was really good at getting his troops to romaine calm.
98. Legumes are now goodwill ambassadors. Their job is to spread peas on Earth.
99. Why did the farmer run inside when he heard a storm was coming? He wanted to be pre-pear-ed.
100. How do adult pickles describe baby pickles? They’re as cuke as a button.
101. Where did the corn get lost? In a maize
102. What did the lettuce say to the celery? “Quit stalking me!”
103. What is a plumbers favorite vegetable? A leek.

Baking puns

104. What’s the proper way to address a royal cake? Good afternoon, your pie-ness.
105. Take the path of yeast resistance.
106. What do cakes shout at the start of every baseball game? Batter up!
107. Did you hear who’s starring in the new movie about cookies? Robert Brownie Jr.
108. A cruller woke up one morning in a strange place. He said, “What am I doughing here? I donut belong.”
109. Bread puns happen when you yeast expect them.
110. I only have pies for you.
111. I donut know what I’d do without you.
112. Two loaves of bread went on vacation together. They packed everything they kneaded.
113. A friend of mine is a pastry chef. He’s a little odd. You might even say he’s a weird-dough.
114. I like big Bundts and I cannot lie!
115. Not all heroes wear crêpes.
116. Why are bakers so wealthy? They make a lot of dough.
117. Where do many bakers get their start? In parking lots, making doughnuts

Meat puns

118. What did the ribeye say to the porterhouse? It’s nice to meat you.
119. I once ate nine tomahawk ribeyes. That was a huge mis-steak.
120. Salami get this straight.
121. Don’t go bacon my heart.
122. How do steaks compliment their coworkers? “That was a job well done!”
123. What’s the name of the meatiest Knight of the Round Table? Sir Loin!
124. What is a hair stylist’s favorite steak? A flat iron!
125. Why don’t cows make good private investigators? Because they refuse to go on steak outs!
126. Why are butchers so good at killing vampires? They know how to put a steak through their hearts.
127. What name did the butcher give the expensive piece of beef? Phil A.
128. What do you call a cow that works out? Lean beef
129. Did you hear about the pig who knows karate? He’s a master of the pork chop.
130. Why did the chicken go to the seance? To talk to the other side
131. Which English statesman invented cured breakfast meat? Sir Francis Bacon
132. I have a hard time finding steak puns. They’re very rare.

Dessert puns

133. When I get mad, ice cream!
134. What did the sundae say to her husband? I’m never gonna run away and dessert you!
135. I love you s’more each day.
136. I cannoli have eyes for you.
137. What did the custard say to the baseball player? I’m your biggest flan!
138. A chocolate cake went to the Sahara and was never heard from again. It was lost in the dessert.

If you made it to the end, thank you for pudding up with us. Now please share this list of food puns on social media and tell everyone how grape we did.